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 Concrete Angel [12+]

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Katelyn
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PostSubject: Concrete Angel [12+]   Sun Aug 02, 2009 8:49 pm

Concrete Angel


Rating: 12+ for brief language and abuse.

Inspired by the song Concrete Angel, by Martina Mcbride and written 1/3/09 in loving memory of Cheryl L. Franks.


Featuring Brian Haner Jr. (Syn Gates)
Disclaimer: My story, but I don't personally know Brian.


“Mommy, daddy stop!” Chelsea pleaded despairingly as tears fell down her small cheeks.

“You stay out of this!” Eric shouted, striking the side of his daughter’s face with his backhand. The force of his blow knocked her to the cold kitchen floor and the room spun in Chelsea’s vision for a moment.

“Just go to your room Chelsea!” Dianne, her mother, shouted at her.

Chelsea didn’t need telling twice; she got up quickly off the kitchen floor where she had fallen and ran upstairs to her bedroom. She lay across her bed and cried as the sounds of her parents shouting and glass shattering echoed throughout the small house. A door slammed fifteen minutes later and the house was finally silent except for the muffled sounds of Chelsea’s sobs into her pillow.

That night was no different than any other night for Chelsea. It was another night of her parents fighting for reasons she didn’t quite understand. Another night of being struck by one of her parents for trying to stop them, and another night of crying herself to sleep and praying that morning would come soon so she could go to school to get away from it all.



“I’m going to school now mommy.” Chelsea said quietly as she clutched her backpack and the lunch she packed the next morning.

Dianne didn’t even look up at her daughter; she just continued to stare down at the table with her head in her hands.

“Just get out of here.” She growled bitterly before reaching one hand to lift up her coffee mug.

Chelsea walked silently across the kitchen and gave her mother one last fleeting look before grasping the handle of the kitchen backdoor and puling it open.

“Goodbye.” She whispered softly as she walked out and closed the door behind her.

She looked longingly at the big yellow bus that passed her on her way to school. She had never gotten to ride a bus before like the other kids. Her parents had told her that she had legs and that she could walk the six blocks to school. So she did. But she didn’t mind it so much. It was quiet. And there was no one around to scold her for walking in the rain puddles on the sidewalk.


“Good morning Miss Caroline.” Chelsea said cheerfully as she walked into her classroom a little while later.

“Oh, good morn- Chelsea!” Her teacher Miss Caroline exclaimed. “Honey what happened to you?”

“What do you mean Miss Caroline?” Chelsea asked innocently, turning her head to the side as a confused look crossed her face.

“Sweetie, how did you get that bruise on your cheek?” Miss Caroline asked as
she brushed Chelsea’s long brown hair out of her face. Chelsea had been secretly hoping that no one would notice the large purple bruise on the side of her face if she kept her hair in the way. Apparently her hopes were short-lived.

“Oh.” Chelsea said touching the spot on her cheek and flinching. “I… tripped.”

“You tripped?” Miss Caroline repeated, with a questioning look. She clearly believed that just ‘tripping’ wouldn’t do that.

“Yes…my…my shoelace was untied.” Chelsea lied. “And I tripped.”

“Oh…well okay. If that’s what you say happened… ” Miss Caroline said slowly. “Go ahead and take your seat then.”

“Okay Miss Caroline.” Chelsea said pleasantly, walking to the desk in the corner of the room that had her name on the front of it.

“Miss Caroline! Miss Caroline!” A shrill voice exclaimed. Caroline looked up at another one of her students, a girl with blonde hair braided neatly with pink bows on the ends.

“Yes Kimberly, what is it?” Caroline asked.

“Miss Caroline! Chelsea wore that same dress yesterday!” Kimberly exclaimed, shooting Chelsea a look of utter horror.

Chelsea flushed scarlet and looked down at her shoes.

“Kimberly!” Caroline said exasperatedly. “That wasn’t nice.”

“But it’s true!” Kimberly protested.

“Kimberly, you say you’re sorry right now.” Caroline said sternly.

Kimberly looked over and gave Chelsea a reproachful look before muttering a barely audible, “I’m sorry.”

“Now I want you all to get out your workbooks and practice your cursive
letters today.” Miss Caroline said as she walked back to the front of the room to sit at her desk.

The students all did as they were instructed and got out their pencils and books as she sat back down at her desk. She looked thoughtfully over at Chelsea sitting quietly by herself as the other children all scooted their desks together to chat with their friends. Not one of the other students dragged their desk to sit and talk with Chelsea. Caroline didn’t know why though; Chelsea was a really nice girl.


“What’s on your mind Caroline?” Mrs. Richards asked her on their lunch break a little later.

Caroline was currently sitting on the sill of the window of the teacher’s lounge that overlooked the playground. She was watching the kids as she sipped her coffee when she spotted Chelsea. Again, she was alone. Most of the other kids were all off playing tag, or swinging on the swing set. Chelsea though, was on the farthest edge of the playground on a wooden bench, drawing in the dirt with the toe of her shoe.

“Oh, just a student of mine.” Caroline replied distantly, turning back to her coworker. “Chelsea Evans.”

“She’s such a sweetheart.” Mrs. Richards smiled.

“She is.” Caroline said. “It’s just…I think…I don’t know…I think there’s something wrong.”

“What do you mean?” Mrs. Richards asked, putting down her coffee.

“She came in this morning with a big bruise on her cheek.” Caroline said.

“Kids get scrapes and bruises all the time.” Mrs. Richards shrugged.

“I know, maybe I’m just being paranoid.” Caroline said. “It’s probably nothing.”

The faint sound of a bell ringing came from outside and the two teachers looked out the window to see the children gathering up from recess.

“See you later Caroline.” Mrs. Richards said leaving the teacher’s lounge.

“You too Sarah.” Caroline said.


“Bye Miss Caroline.” The children all chorused together at the end of the school day.

“Hey Becky, watch this.” Kimberly said slyly to her friend as she saw Chelsea walking down the school steps to the sidewalk.

“Whoops!” She said to Chelsea as she shoved her aside, causing her to fall in one of the rain puddles leftover from the night before. “Oh Chelsea! I’m so sorry.”

Chelsea looked up at Kimberly from her spot in the middle of the puddle completely stunned at what had just happened.

“Do you need me to go get a teacher? You know you really shouldn’t be playing in rain puddles.” Kimberly said with an evil smirk on her face.

“N-no.” Chelsea stammered, fighting back tears. “I’m f-fine.”

Kimberly and Becky walked away to their bus in fits of laughter as Chelsea got up.
Her blue sundress was now splattered with mud, sopping wet, and clung to her frail legs as she walked home. Away from the sight of her classmates, tears flowed freely from her pale blue eyes. She wiped these away carelessly and winced as her hand grazed the still healing bruise on her cheek.

She opened the kitchen door a few minutes later and flinched when it creaked like it always did. She carefully took off her soaked, white Chuck Taylor high-tops and left then to dry on the back step before walking quietly across the kitchen floor, leaving small wet footprints from her socks.

“Chelsea Marie Evans!” Dianne shrieked walking into the kitchen to see her daughter. “Look what you’ve done to this floor!”

“But-” Chelsea protested.

“Now I have to re-mop this entire floor!” Dianne shouted, still taking no notice
of Chelsea’s disheveled appearance.

“But mommy-” Chelsea started again.

“Just go to your room before I beat you with this mop.” Dianne growled threateningly as she pulled the mop back out of the broom cupboard.

Fresh tears streamed silently down Chelsea’s cheeks as she walked up the stairs to her room. She knew this was no empty threat from her mother. Dianne had hit her with worse things than just the mop.

“And wash that dress!” Dianne called after her. “It’s filthy.”


A few hours had gone by before Chelsea finally gathered the courage to venture back downstairs. She could no longer ignore her growling stomach and after changing her dress, she walked quietly back down the staircase.

“Mommy?” She asked timidly from the doorway of the living room.

“What?” Dianne demanded harshly, snapping her head away from the television program she was watching to glare at her daughter. Chelsea gulped and flinched back a little before answering her.

“I’m hungry.” She said quietly.

“Well go on.” Dianne said waving her hand impatiently as she turned back to the television program she was watching. “You know where the food is.”

Chelsea nodded and turned around to walk back down the hall in the direction of the kitchen. She took a kitchen chair and pushed it up to the base of the food cupboard so she could reach the peanut butter and bread from the top shelf.

She was almost through with her sandwich when she heard the front door slam, signaling her father Eric’s return from work.

“You would not believe the day I had today.” She heard him say.

“Yeah ‘cause it must be so hard to sit behind a desk all day.” She heard her mother retort sarcastically.

“Don’t you start with me Dianne you don’t do anything for this house.” Eric spat angrily.

Chelsea winced as she realized this was going to be another night of her parents fighting. They always fought. If it wasn’t one of her parents starting it, the other would make some snide comment and it would start again.

“Anything?!” Dianne shouted. “I’ll have you know I do twice as much for this family than you ever have!”

“I highly doubt that.” Eric said spitefully.

“Fine! I’ll leave then if that’s what you want!” Dianne shouted. “I’ll just leave and you’ll see how this house goes to hell without me!”

Those words made Chelsea’s ears prick up. Generally she would try to block out the fighting and try hard not to listen, but it was different when one of them threatened to leave. As much as she hated hearing her parents fighting, she didn’t want them to loose them. They were the only people she had.

“No mommy, don’t go!” Chelsea shouted running into the living room where her parents were fighting.

“You aren’t going anywhere.” Eric growled, taking a hold of his wife’s wrist before she could pass him on her way to the front door.

“Watch me.” Dianne spat venomously.

“Mommy no! Please don’t go!” Chelsea pleaded, taking a hold of her mother’s other hand.

“Let go of me!” Dianne shouted furiously, wrenching her hand out of Chelsea’s grasp and smacking her in the process.

“Just go to your room Chelsea!” Eric shouted angrily as he struggled to retain a grip on Dianne’s wrist.

Chelsea stumbled up the steps though tear filled eyes and into her room. She walked over to her open window and put her head in her folded arms on the windowsill as she cried. All she wanted was for her parents to stop fighting. Was that too much to ask? She looked up at the inky black sky and at the millions of stars above her.

She thought as she gazed upwards, and wished for someone to help her. Chelsea had never been to a church before; her parents had never gone, but she knew even if someone didn’t go to church, they could still pray. So that’s what she did. Chelsea prayed for someone to help her. Someone she could talk to. A friend.

“Hi.” A small voice said.

She gasped and turned her attention back down across from her. There in the house next door, was a little boy around her age with looking at her from his own bedroom window. He had untidy black hair and warm chocolate brown eyes. He had high cheekbones, even for a nine-year-old and a friendly smile on his face. But it was strange for Chelsea to see someone in the house next door; she didn’t think anyone lived in that house anymore. She didn’t linger on this thought long though, and assumed he and his family must have just moved in.

“H-hi.” She said shakily, wiping the remaining tears on her face away quickly so the boy wouldn’t see.

“I’m Brian.” The boy said. “What’s your name?”

“Chelsea.” She sniffed.

“Nice to meet you Chelsea.” He said smiling kindly. She found it extremely odd that someone was talking to her. Normally other kids would ignore her, or make fun of her when they thought she couldn’t hear.

“How old are you?” She asked curiously.

“I’m almost ten.” He said proudly. “How about you?”

“I’m almost ten too.” She said, an actual smile making its way across her face.

“Do you want to be my friend?” He asked with a smile.

“Okay.” She agreed.

The two stayed at their windows talking for a while as Chelsea’s parents continued shouting downstairs. But they ignored them; or at least pretended to. Brian would glance concernedly over her shoulder every now and then upon hearing glass shattering or loud banging. Chelsea saw his concerned look but continued to smile and talk as if nothing was happening downstairs. For that moment, it was just the two of them. She had a friend. Something she had been longing for, for a long time. She finally had someone she could talk to. Who didn’t make fun of her like the rest of the children in her school.

“Hey Chelsea?” Brian asked a little later after the yelling and loud banging had finally stopped downstairs.

“Yes?” She asked, lifting her head that she had resting in her arms on the windowsill.

“Why were you crying earlier?” He asked.

“My mommy and daddy were fighting.” She said quietly.

“Do they do that a lot?” He asked.

“All the time.” She said. “What about yours?”

“No.” He said, somewhat distantly.

“Oh.” She said yawning.

“We should go to bed, it’s late.” Brian said.

“Okay.” She sighed, turning away from the window.

“Oh, Brian?” She called, going back to the window.

“Yes?” He asked, reappearing at his own.

“Will I see you tomorrow?” She asked hopefully.

“Sure you will.” He said smiling. “Goodnight Chelsea.”

“Goodnight Brian.” She said.




Last edited by Katelyn on Mon Aug 03, 2009 2:02 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Sun Aug 02, 2009 8:50 pm


“Chelsea? Could you come here for a minute?” Caroline asked her the next day during class.

“Okay.” Chelsea said getting up from her desk. “Yes Miss Caroline?”

“Honey did someone hit you?” Caroline asked.

“What? Oh, um no.” Chelsea lied quickly, shifting uneasily back and forth on her feet.

“Sweetie it looks like someone’s hand right here.” Caroline said touching Chelsea’s cheek gently.

“No, I fell again.” Chelsea said.

“Chelsea honey you can tell me.” Caroline said, lowering her voice so none of the other students could hear even if they were paying attention to what was going on at the teacher’s desk. “What is it?”

“It’s nothing.” Chelsea said. “I’m okay, I promise.”

“Are you sure?” Caroline asked concernedly as the school bell rang, signaling the children’s recess.

“Mhmm.” She nodded, rocking back and forth on the balls of her feet.

“Okay then…” Caroline said uneasily. “You can go out to recess now.”

“Okay, bye Miss Caroline.” Chelsea waved as she walked out of the classroom.

Chelsea walked outside by herself and watched the other children run up ahead to play with their friends on the playground. She sighed and sat down on a bench beneath a big oak tree, making drawings in the dirt with her shoe.

“Hi Chelsea!” A voice from behind her said.

She turned around in her seat on the bench and gasped. “Brian!” She said breaking into a wide smile.

“How come you’re not playing over there with the other kids?” Brian asked curiously, as he sat down on the bench beside her.

“They don’t want to play with me.” She said quietly, looking back down at
the flower she was drawing in the dirt with her foot.

“Oh.” He said slowly. “Why not?”

“They don’t like me very much.” She mumbled, still not looking up to meet his gaze.

“I like you.” He said, reaching over to put a hand on hers. She looked down as he gave her hand a gentle squeeze and then up to smile at him.

“Chelsea?” Kimberly asked walking over to her with a few of her friends. Chelsea gasped a little in surprise and turned her head to look ahead of her. “Who are you talking to?”

“I’m talking to my fri-” Chelsea said looking over at where Brian was sitting, but he wasn’t there.

“What a freak!” Becky exclaimed. “She was talking to herself!”

“I was not!” Chelsea said defiantly.

“Oh really?” Kimberly sneered. “Then who were you talking to?”

“My friend Brian.” Chelsea said confidently.

“Yeah, imaginary friend.” One of the other girls laughed.

“I didn’t imagine him!” Chelsea protested.

“Whatever.” Kimberly said rolling her eyes. “C’mon girls, let’s go.”

“What a weirdo.” She heard one of the girls whisper as they walked away.

“Brian?” Chelsea asked looking around the bench. “Brian where are-”
But the school bell ringing interrupted her.

“Oh well.” She sighed as she went back into the school building with the other students. She figured he must have already gone inside with his class.



“I’m home!” Chelsea called walking thorough the kitchen door after school.

“Young…l-lady where have you been?” Eric demanded as he stood, more like stumbled as he got up drunkenly from the kitchen table.

“I was at school.” She said quietly as she put her backpack down on the floor by her shoes she kicked off.

“What took you so long?” He asked harshly. Even from across the room she could smell the alcohol on him.

“I’m always home at this time of day daddy.” She said quietly, feeling more uneasy by the minute by her fathers drunken state. She was always frightened of him when he was like this. He was always angry when he drank a lot of beer.

“Whatever, I need you to go to the store and get me s’more beer.” He slurred as he staggered towards her.

“But daddy, I can’t go-”

“Don’t you talk back to me young lady!” He thundered, gripping her painfully on the arm.

“Daddy ow! You’re hurting me!” She winced.

“When I tell you to do something, you listen!” He shouted, making her cower in fear.

“Ow! Please daddy let me go!” She cried. “My arm…you’re hurting me please let me go.”

“Get out of my sight.” He snarled shoving her aside, sending her to the floor.

She scrambled shakily to her feet and ran out of the kitchen as fast as she could up to her bedroom. She didn’t even bother to wipe the tears off her face as she closed her door and went to lie down on her stomach across her bed. She could hear her father stumbling drunkenly around downstairs and then heavy footsteps on the stairs. Chelsea held her breath but her father didn’t come into her room like she thought he would; he went into his bedroom at the end of the hall.

“What happened this time?” She heard Brian call from outside her open window.

“Brian?” She gasped, her face lifting in surprise as she got off the bed and went over to her window.

“You got hurt again.” He said sadly as he saw her tear-stained face.

“I’m okay.” She lied wiping her eyes quickly. “Where did you go earlier?”

“Oh, I was… around.” He said distantly.

“Chelsea!” She heard her mother shout from downstairs. “Get your ass down here now!”

“I have to go.” She said quietly.

“No don’t go!” He said with a worried look on his face.

“Chelsea!” Her mother called again.

“I’m sorry, I have to.” She said giving him an apologetic look before leaving the window and going out her bedroom door.

“Yes mommy?” She asked, walking into the kitchen a minute later.

“Eat.” Dianne ordered, pointing at the sandwich on the table.

“Okay.” She said quietly, walking to go sit at the table.

She was almost finished with the sandwich when she noticed the suitcases by the kitchen door.

“Mommy? Are we going on a trip?” She asked curiously.

“Yes, hurry up and finish.” Dianne said looking out the window over the sink.

“DIANNE!” She heard her dad roar drunkenly from upstairs.

“C’mon Chelsea get up!” Dianne hissed, pulling her from the table by the arm.

“Dianne no!” Eric shouted, stumbling drunkenly into the kitchen. “You are not leaving!”

“Yes I am Eric.” Dianne said through clenched teeth. “And I’m taking Chelsea.”

“I said NO!” He shouted, grabbing onto Dianne’s arm.

“Chelsea, go.” Dianne said letting go of her arm. “Go get in the car.”

“You are not leaving me!” Eric shouted pulling Chelsea back. The force he used to pull her back made Chelsea stumble backwards and she fell hard against the table before collapsing on the floor.

“You bastard! Look what you’ve done!” Dianne shouted furiously, bending down to where Chelsea fell.

“Oh God.” Eric said looking down horrified at his hands.

“Oh God there’s a lot of blood!” Dianne shouted. “Call 911!”

“NO! No police!” Eric shouted frantically as Dianne scooped up Chelsea into her arms.

“I have to get her to a hospital!” Dianne shouted, walking towards the kitchens backdoor. Eric was running his hands through his hair worriedly before he finally decided he had to do something. If they took Chelsea to the hospital or even called the police, they would see the marks and bruises on her. They would both be put in prison and he could not let that happen.

“No!” He shouted, pulling a gun from the back of his jeans. “We can work this out! No police! No hospitals!”

“Eric.” Dianne said shakily, backing against the kitchen door with Chelsea still in her arms. “Put…put the gun down. She needs a h-hospital. I’m taking her to-”

“NO!” Eric shouted, firing the gun.

Dianne stared, still in complete in shock at her husband. She was still alive. He had missed her. “Oh God Chelsea!” She shrieked, looking down at her in her arms.

“Oh my God.” Eric cried, dropping the gun immediately.

“You shot her!” Dianne shouted accusingly, kneeling on the floor with Chelsea in her arms.

“N-no. I-I didn’t m-mean to.” Eric sobbed falling to his knees.

“She’s dead!” Dianne shouted distraughtly as tears started pouring form her eyes. “She’s dead and you killed her!”

“No, no, no, no!” Eric cried.

“How could you?” Dianne croaked as she rocked Chelsea’s frail body in her now bloodstained arms.

“I’m s-so s-s-sorry.” Eric sobbed as he picked up the gun off of the kitchen floor.

“Eric? Eric what are you doing?” Dianne asked shakily as she watched him raise the gun again.

“F-forgive me.” He blubbered before pointing the gun at her, and firing.

“I’m…I’m so s-sorry.” He whispered to his wife and daughter’s now dead bodies. He gazed down at them for one last time before turning the gun on himself.



“Caroline?” Sarah asked putting a hand on her shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s all my fault.” Caroline whispered as she watched the small casket being lowered slowly into the ground.

“No, don’t say that.” Sarah said sitting down on one of the white wooden folding
chairs beside her.

“But it’s true.” Caroline said wiping a stray tear from her face. “I should have done something. I should have-”

“Caroline you can’t blame yourself for this.” Sarah said sympathetically. “You couldn’t have known this would happen.”

“But I saw it!” Caroline cried, fresh tears making their way down her face. “I saw that there was something wrong. But I didn’t….I just didn’t do anything. I didn’t do anything. She’s gone Sarah. Chelsea’s gone.”



“Brian I don’t want them to be sad.” The little girl said turning to the boy she was standing with in the cemetery. They both stood a few yards away from the funeral by a large oak tree watching the people there walk away with tears in their eyes.

“It’s okay Chelsea.” He said kindly. “They’ll understand. But it’s time to go.”

“Will mommy and daddy be where we're going?" She asked worriedly, looking at the people leaving her funeral, then back to him.

“No.” He said, smiling as he took her hand in his. “Come on. Let’s go home.”

“Home.” She sighed, returning the smile as she walked with him. “I’d like that.”



“Come on honey, let’s get you home.” Sarah said helping Caroline to her feet.

They were walking back to the car when Caroline paused and turned around. From the spot where she stood, she saw a little boy and a girl in a blue sundress walking hand in hand.

“Goodbye Chelsea.” Caroline whispered before getting into the car.
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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Mon Aug 03, 2009 4:47 pm

Wow this is really really good!!!
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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Mon Aug 03, 2009 4:48 pm

Aw, thankya! Very Happy

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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Mon Aug 03, 2009 4:51 pm

I really like it.
It's original.
Good job x
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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Wed Aug 05, 2009 6:39 am

Really different premise, I really liked it ^^
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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Wed Aug 05, 2009 7:16 am

Awh, I really liked this one.
'Tis different from your usual witty style, but really good.
And I knew she was going to die the moment Brian told her not to go. >.<
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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Wed Aug 05, 2009 9:50 am

Aw, thanks girlies!
I really appreciate that. Very Happy

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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Thu Aug 06, 2009 6:34 am

No problem Smile x
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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Fri Aug 07, 2009 8:00 am

ive read this before!!!
i was actually thinking about it earlier before i saw it here XD

i love it,as alwayss
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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Fri Aug 07, 2009 2:46 pm

Thank you so much! Very Happy

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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Thu Aug 20, 2009 10:25 pm

-bursts into hysterical tears-
I can't believe that I still cry every time I read this!
It's so sad and amazingly written and I just love it.
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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Fri Aug 21, 2009 1:39 pm

I made you cry again?
I'm sorry! But, thank you Very Happy

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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   Fri Aug 21, 2009 1:42 pm

Yes! I can't help it; the tears just start flowing when I read this.
You're welcome, though. Very Happy
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PostSubject: Re: Concrete Angel [12+]   

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Concrete Angel [12+]
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